Whenever someone close to me passes, I usually do some sort of entry on my journal where I talk about how special they are. I haven’t done that in a while, but I figured I’d do one for my grandfather, Gonzalo Baylon. The best way for me to honor him is to speak about his character.
Lolo Salo had the kindest soul. He was a strong man, yet he was gentle. My Lolo and Lola met when he worked at my Lola’s family’s farm. My Lolo herded the cows and tended to them. My great grandfather, Andres Calungsod, set an arranged marriage for my Lola, Caridad Calungsod, to marry my Lolo! Lolo Andres said that my Lola will NEVER find a man as loving and caring as Lolo Salo. At the time, my Lola did not take this news well because she had other suitors that she deemed were better matches for her, but they married. And they had children, many of them. My Lola at one point in their marriage fell very ill. And my grandfather, the best way he knew how, cared for her with all his heart and soul. And they fell in love.
I asked my mom about her favorite memory of Lolo. She said she LOVED it when she would fall asleep in the living room and he would pick her up and take her to her room to sleep. My aunt later on told me that her brothers and sisters would pretend to fall asleep just so he could carry them upstairs. When he laid them down on the bed, he was often met with eyes wide open or giggles.
I didn’t have the privilege to spend most of my years with Lolo by my side. But he let me know that he often thought about me. He never said an unkind word about me when others would. Lolo always was the peaceful and calm one of the couple. It’s interesting to see who inherited his mannerisms in the family. If you look through pictures of him, you will soon discover that my Lolo loved to smile and was always stylish wearing his sunglasses. He had a soft spot for children. He lost his oldest and his youngest child at very young ages; a pain a parent should never bear. I think this is why he has a soft spot for kids.
My Lolo LOVED to dance. He didn’t care WHAT kind of music. He just moved to the beat. When I was in high school, someone had put on a Mystikal CD and he busted a move, let me tell ya.
My Lolo was not judgemental. He just took in information and trusted the Lord to help him through his hardships. That’s probably the most important thing about my Lolo: the fact that his faith was unshakable! He loved God and was always praying. Through his bouts of Alzheimer’s Disease, there were two things that remained constant for him. 1. The Lord and 2. My grandmother. Everyone else, even his own children, he would sometimes forget.
My Lolo didn’t finish elementary school. His highest level of education was 4th grade. But he had so much knowledge and wisdom and instilled that into his children. He also instilled in them a hard work ethic and focused on education being important. All of his children are successful in their fields of practice.
I’m grateful to God I got to see my Lolo one last time this past year. May and June 2011 changed my life in more ways than one. There are memories when Lolo had bouts of clarity that I am holding on to for dear life. One was when he was in the hospital. I told him I was leaving to go back to the house. And he replied with impeccable timing and humor, “Why are you leaving me? Don’t you love me?” I responded, “Of course, I do! But I need to take a shower, I smell bad.” He chuckled and said, “Yeah, you do. Don’t forget to always pray, ok?” And his stubbled face and lips touched my cheek and he gave me a kiss.
My Lolo’s kiss is not just an ordinary kiss. No, it was special. He didn’t pucker up his lips and kiss you in that manner. He put his nose and lips to your cheek and breathed in. He just breathed you in as if he was clinging to your smell to store in his memory. I kiss Lilly like that sometimes and she gets tickled pink.
If my future husband could be a quarter of the man my Lolo was, I would be enthralled in my marriage. My Lolo was by no means perfect, but he was the prime example of what a father should be. He even fathered many of his grandchildren, me included.
I was told when I was younger, I was usually a quiet kid. So when one of my cousins would fight with me, I would cry. Immediately, my grandfather would come to my rescue and ask, “Who’s bothering, Marianne? What are you doing to her?” with anger. But one of the gentle memories of him is when I had a balloon that accidentally flew away and got caught at the top of this tall tree by our house. I immediate asked Lolo to cut the tree down so I could get my balloon back. He didn’t look at his 5 year old granddaughter and laugh or ridicule this ridiculous request. Instead he was empathetic, said that the tree deserved to live and moved on from there.
I can’t say enough kind words about my Lolo. But this is just a snapshot of his heart. A heart I miss so much, I steal tear up when I think of him. My selfish heart breaks because I long to hold his hand or try to playfully frighten him or mock the silly sounds he made. But I know he’s in God’s Holy Throne and is at peace. I know he has reunited with family members, a few children, and many friends. I know he danced through those pearly gates praising God for bringing him home. I still feel my grandfather’s presence. And I can’t wait to see him again.
Please pray for my grandmother who lost her partner of 68 years. I can’t imagine her pain. Specifically, pray for inner peace and decreased feelings of loneliness.
Rest In Peace Lolo. You are so loved and so missed by all of us here. Heaven is so lucky to have gained you in their presence.
August 7, 1922 – November17, 2011
